There was a long silence as the door handle rattled, their heartbeats raced as they turned to look at the bravest of the three of them. Her own jaw had dropped, her own pulse racing as she grasped at their hands and allowed her teeth to nervously bury themselves into her bottom lip as she stepped towards the door. Mentally counting to ten, she yanked it open preparing herself for some madman with an axe. At the empty space she felt herself whimper with relief. She looked over her shoulder at them, her ginger fringe hiding the fear in her swirling grey eyes.
Why were they here? Well, that was an interesting question. They'd tell you themselves but they didn't truthfully know either. They'd wanted out of town, to escape their traitors of friends who'd made arrangements nad hadn't included them. They weren't a malicious threesome but when they got started, they never stopped. The anger they had felt had been almost physical. The overwhelming urge to punch their friends smug faces in had been so powerful, the ginger had actually been dragged away just to save herself from getting into trouble. The problem was they were all vulnerable, sure they never admitted that but there is always that certain line you didn't cross. To know their friends were going away without them was making them question their qualities. Were they bad friends or what?
Taking hold of one of the cider bottles, she tipped her head back and allowed the sweet nectar glide down her throat. At first it felt as if it was going to stop at the lump in her throat but it managed to push itself back. Her stomach settled as the dizzy sensation of alcohol hit her brain. She wasn't one to get drunk, she had the same genes as her father and she knew this. Probably the reason she'd turned into a small alcoholic in the past few months. She took one final swig before throwing the bottle against the wall. The other two winced at the point of contact, small shards of green glass sparkled everywhere as the moonlight shone through them. No one could ever work out if alcohol had a good effect on her but they noticed now as she grinned.
The grin stretched across her chubby face, her dimples didn't appear and the glint in the cold blue eyes caused their hearts to race more than the rattling handle. "We need to punish them." She whispered softly flopping down onto the floor and placing a chocolate raisin on the end of her tongue. The two friends were shocked. She made this appear as if it was some normal conversation. But to her it probably was. Everyday she discussed the idea of punishing her aunt for making her life a hell and here she was talking about their friends. People they were meant to love.
"What are we thinking about?"
"A few harmless pranks." She said back as if shocked that they would be scared she would do something else. This was her, she was the happy one. The one who smiled through the bad times and the scary times. The blonde looked over at the brunette.
"Where's the harm in a few harmless pranks?"
Saturday, September 6, 2008
The Beginning
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5 comments:
I like it. I only have two comments about the actual writing but I like the content. Good allure, nice hook.
They need names. I don't use names in my fiction but that's because I over-emphasize the class of the characters for effect. For a real-world novel, I think that names are necessary.
And two, I think that it needs a little more exposition. As a prologue, this would do great, but if this were the first chapter, it just leaves too many open questions.
I do love it, though. I'm avidly anticipating more.
Glass
Ah, my little friend. Of course they will get names and characteristics eventually.
And, it is just a prologue. Sorry. I always write prologues.
[[x]]
hey hey helen
i missed the internet-mi family sed it wo "family time" and i wo like no i finally have mi internet back
the three girls remind me of sum poeple....lol..i wonder who
lv
lindz
Definitely, and interesting beginning. Like the attitude.
I like it......anything else can not be in put to words.
Though this is funny cause i wrote a blog about a dead chick, too. U seem that like you could how say help me edit it so i would very much appreciate if you would take a look.
Blog: www.mydeadlover.blogspot.com
-Catherine
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